Tips for the truly jaded: embrace the role of the opossum and keep the conversation minimal. Basically, plan your life around being aggressively antisocial.

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INSTEAD of being dragged from slumber with a grudge against the world, does your partner leap peppily and unbearably from the bed? Here’s how to handle it. <p><strong>INSTEAD of being dragged from slumber with a grudge against the world, does your partner leap peppily and unbearably from the bed? Here’s how to handle it: </strong></p> <p><strong>Leave the f**ker to it</strong></p> <p>Remain undisturbed. Allow the upbeat, popping-candy monstrosity humming cheerfully and monologuing about what a l...