This absurdly expensive, wireless underwater vacuum promises to handle every algae bloom and leaf carcass in your supposedly ‘curated’ inground pool, eliminating the need for actual manual labor. Naturally, every fresh-faced yoga guru in Pescadero thinks owning this $1200 piece of submersible tech signals her ascent into a higher plane of existence, far above mere pool skimmers and manual back-scratching. Its inability to function reliably while grappling with seasonal detritus like mangrove roots or discarded artisanal tequila bottle caps ensures that all aspirational perfection will sink into sticky, silent failure.